Are You Providing Care for a Seriously Ill Person?

 

Take care of yourself as well and do not be shy to ask for help

Do not be shy to ask for help

Caring for someone seriously ill is a very demanding life situation and requires much from both the body and soul of the caregiver. It usually is not possible for one person to fulfill all the needs for a seriously ill patient. When we are able to tell our friends and relatives: I am doing my best, but it is too much for me. I am not managing. I need help…, it is a manifestation of strength rather than weakness. If you ask for help, you may be surprised to find that people around you are happy to give it, and that they were already thinking about it but did know how to start.

Do not neglect yourself. Take care of yourself, too

When we are caring for others, we have a tendency to “overlook” ourselves, focusing only on the needs and wishes of the other person. But it is completely OK and even necessary to think of ourselves as well. Enough sleep, food and exercise contribute to the regeneration of your psychological as well as physical abilities that you need to be able to provide care for your relative. Your work is very hard. Do not be falsely modest. Admit this to yourself openly. Caring for the ill is often very hard work and can even lead to health problems. If your back or neck hurts, do not hesitate to seek help, a massage, or rehabilitation.

Do not hide from the world. Do not avoid your friends

The fact that you are caring for someone ill and are suffering along with him/her does not mean that you cannot leave for even one minute, that you are not allowed to experience joy and that you have to give up completely things that give you pleasure. Your life has not stopped. Pleasant experiences and fun will make you feel better and from them you will be able to draw energy for difficult times. Nothing is wrong with going out for a walk, sitting in a café with a friend, going out for a concert. On the contrary, it is good! And moreover, what you experience “outside”, you can bring home to your ill relative and thus enrich him/her or just please them.

Do not be afraid to show your feelings. Do not suffer alone

“Shared joy, double joy; shared worry, half worry.” This is what the Czech proverb says and it is so true. Caring for a seriously ill person brings many feelings, among which the negative prevail. We feel exhausted, sad, helpless, and sometimes even angry. Expressing your sadness, fear, or feelings of loneliness to your wider family or friends will help you to handle difficult situations and also the expected loss better. Find ears that will listen and hands that will stroke you.